-Mobile continuation from Xanga blog PinkyGuerrero at PinkyGuerrero, Pinky, Janika, Basically Clueless & this blog PinkFeldspar, in that order.
-Most of the graphics and vids click to sources.
-Personal blog for Janika Banks.
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Monday, January 18, 2021

Happy #NationalPopcornDay

Hope you guys stocked up on popcorn.

My house is a world of calm. If the world shakes, I won't even know it.

Sunday, January 17, 2021

little bitty coin

When you're literally popping tiny coins while whatsapp messaging with Pimpy.. Just missed catching a notification coming in over that. Scott called it LittleBittyCoin. Get it? Bitcoin. Nevermind.

Got this one after I switched cities.

Ignore that web address, I was talking about something else. Anyway, I really did talk to Pimpy, so achievement unlocked and I can chill the rest of the day now.

It all started here, click the snip to see the video.

So I found Pimpy (Hidden Things in Front of Your Eyes) through Charlie Ward and he's honestly my fave for catching up on daily opinionating on world events. Pimpy was at the big DC rally, very cool. I've been watching him for months.

So Pimpy's big thing is he's an investment watcher and apparently really good and trustworthy, runs a big group on FB and has Twitter, lotta live updates on YouTube (investment is this other channel), so if you guys have more money than me and have been wondering about crypto and bitcoin, Pimpy has the experience and interest to get you started or fixed or redirected. Not being paid or even link swapped to say that. He doesn't know I'm writing this.

keep the faith

This is a copy paste over from Capt Ed Hayes Ret.: 20 Points of Why America Is Transitioning Corporate to Republic & Biden Will Not Be President! - A Must Read! Saturday, January 16, 2021 11:12 

From Capt. Ed Hayes, Ret.

I hesitate to send some of these things out since there have been so many that were apparent scams but for what it’s worth here this is. But………………a question I have, IF TRUE,………………….would a military man share this with his Father-In-Law?

“A US Air Force pilot received this information and he forwarded it to his father-in- law. He says, “We need 100% of the people indoors to see what the US military is going to broadcast on everyone’s tv sets worldwide. It’s going to be very painful; but we can no longer have people divided. “Around Sunday or Monday, POTUS will send out a message saying, ‘My fellow Americans, the storm is upon us. We will go to full global martial law.’ “He will most likely be on Air Force1, sending out 7 presidential messages to everyone’s phones and tv sets worldwide on EMS; all global military via US military will shut down all media, all internet, social media, all tv programming, phones, all on one channel on EMS so US military can broadcast 10 days of the storm, 10 days of sessions, 3 hour video confessions, from a military tribunal, lots of evidence for the scandals listed in the storm. “While this is happening, the government will be making global arrests, Americans will be arrested around the globe and people who participated in this coup attempt against the President of the United States.”

1. Trump was not running for just another 4 year election in 2016 – Trump was approached by the military to run and his entire win has been and still is a military operation.

2. Trump’s first 4 years was to drain the lower swamp first. The swamp was/is deep and incorporated every industry in the world, banking, movie, pharmaceutical, food, you name it they controlled it; much has been handled.

3. Barack Obama before leaving office signed an executive order to pardon anyone prior of any crimes in the government. This is WHY no one was held accountable when the Trump took office.

4. These swamp rats could not be tried for those crimes (ie: Hillary email scandal, Clinton Foundation, FISA spying on the Trump campaign etc) ~ only crimes AFTER Obama left office could tried – therefore, new crimes had to be snared.

5. The military needed to catch them in the act committing crimes with proof.

6. President Trump said in his speech January 7th, 2021: there will be “a smooth, orderly transition of power.”

7. This in no way means that President Trump is transitioning power from his first term to Joe Biden! Did you hear him say Joe Biden?

8. We are transitioning from the defunct USA Corp to the Republic (not Biden). President Trump will not technically get a “second term” and as he tweeted, “won’t be at the Inauguration Day in January” ~ this means there won’t be an Inauguration Day. This was the last recorded term of a President who served in the “American Corporation”.

9. President Trump dismantled the Banking Act of 1781 from England. The United States is going back to being a Republic and Donald J Trump will be the first President of the new republic with the Constitution fully intact.

10. The start date for the new Republic is March 4, 2021 ~ this was the original start date of the new President (until it was changed under FDR in 1933).

11. At the end of President Trump’s speech he said: “Our incredible journey is only just beginning.” Boom

11. No matter what it loks like, it’s all optics; Military operations have thought of everything.

12. Trump won an overwhelming victory and will be the President ~ of the New Republic.

13. The swamp rats needed to commit their crime during the last 4 years; and they have now been snared.

14. Certifying a knowingly fraudulent election as Pence and Congress just did is treason.

15. Now President Trump is still the President of the United States until January 20, 2021. He has the power to invoke the insurrection act. The Insurrection Act deals with treason at a military level.

16. Why did the president not involve the Insurrection Act before? Because it involves the military and people would have accused him of being a dictator. He has given everybody ample opportunity to come clean with the fraudulent election: the Supreme Court, the DOJ, the courts, congress, and the vice president. They all picked their lane for the most part and chose to certify a (knowingly) fraudulent election.

17. Many Trump supporters have been pressured and threatened by the deep state, they always have. People appearing to go against Trump have either been threatened or they are part of the deep state. People have picked their lanes.

18. Do not underestimate the President and this military operation. Trump often appears weak before he wins (read The Art of the Deal). Twitter and Facebook now banning (censoring) the President ~ this gives the President the opportunity to use the Emergency Broadcast System (set up in 2018) in order to contact all Americans for what they will need to hear regarding the next steps.

19. Trump has said over and over: “we have it all (the evidence).” He has also said: “we will never surrender.” And, he said: “the best is yet to come!”

20. Do not watch or trust the MSM; they are deep state. Do not give up. Keep the faith!!!

Saturday, January 16, 2021

DC lockdown, Pelosi arrested, popcorn, and the upcoming 'covid crisis'

Pix click to sources or sauce.

And this??? πŸ‘€

Earlier today, FB fogged over a legit post I made saying one piece of it didn't fact check properly, and I got pissed and put it right back up, only bigger and better. So far no one is messing with it.

And twitter pulled this on the rest of my accounts today, keeping in mind they completely suspended another account just days ago.

So I'm skating up to the edge and spitting into the abyss with as little actual provocation as possible. I managed to lay low all this time, but I'm so sick of this now I just don't even care any more. Twitter can burn. I'll stay as long as twitter is still alive because I've been using it for years, but I will NOT cry if it all comes crashing down over their idiocy. They have violated several laws, they've been to hearings, pretty sure Jack is already arrested and this company will be broken up by a court of law sometime in future, but for now, twitter itself as a platform is one of the most brilliant I've ever played on and I really hope it's either salvageable or code copied well enough to be reborn as another platform.

Visitors from the last 30 days are from 20 different countries (including 'other', whatever the heck that is). Waving hi back at you guys. πŸ‘‹

I dunno about you all, but I need a brain cleanser before I go back to bed.

Thursday, January 14, 2021

black pill funk like

My own black pill around this latest administration lasted about 5 months, from January 2018 to May 2018 (keeping in mind that I didn't vote for either main candidate). I wept through the first 3 months dredging through the kid thing, 

and then super deep dove into utter proofs of proofs, and by mid-May that year was finally pulling out of that horrible kamikaze dive into the depths of the oblivion of spiritual abyss.

Since I've been openly depression blogging since 2014 and experimenting with it since 2013hinting at it since 2011 from a mostly private blog and sticking a toe out on a public one, and pretending it was something else since 2007, I am very familiar with the black pill process. I've gone through it repeatedly, and I don't even try to hide it most of the time. Basic black pill is like walking around in a thick fog of extreme disappointment that nothing can pull you out of, and I spent years dealing with bouts of black pill via sarcasm, mockery, ugly truth bombs, lengthy diatribes, and so forth. I heavily struggled with how bad my attitude was for years, to the point of loathing my own blogs, which I mostly kept private. Once I saw how ugly I could be and how much time I was putting into being ugly, I realized I was creating ugliness. I had become that black pill. Pulling out of that into open blogging took about two hard years of strict self monitoring and assessing, with a full mission statement in 2013, which remains private.

Seeing black pilling happen among anons, Trumpers, and Q fans is almost fun, as people-watching sports go. It's predictable, and really does sort the wheat from the tares. It's not fun, though, when someone close to you is going through it, and, despite my wealth of experience with it, I feel like last night was a big fail on my part.

Black pilling is also known as 'dark night of the soul', where deep introspection is about the only way forward once 'truth' hits and knocks a person out of their little sky like a BB in a sparrow. If truth doesn't fit the reality construction a person lives in, their 'safe zone' of 'facts', as it were, either there is auto deflect back into safe zone and utter rejection of truth, or there is massive disillusionment at rapid speed and nothing to grab onto during freefall into that life gutter where everything seems miserably black, and it only makes sense in that state to accept that all is lost and there is no hope. The long, dark night of the soul is that in-between period between the fall and the rising back up.

That is the point where soul searching kicks in for some people. Some of us absolutely cannot accept that all is lost, and we find that red line inside of us that defines what we will and won't accept as reality on this earth. And if that reality is horribly real, we do something about it. And that is what the Great Awakening is all about. We are a collection of people no longer in slumber who draw lines around what is no longer acceptable. The truth, as it were, isn't something we found 'out there' or made up. The truth is the reality that humans harm other humans for pleasure and profit, and that we are powerful enough to make that stop, so why haven't we???

Until a person wraps their mind around the heartbreaking fact that there are humans on this planet who will go to any extreme to steal, farm, own, use, sell, and throw away other people like commodities, nothing else in world politics makes sense. Realizing that the network of complicity is so deeply entrenched in every society around the world that we are all swimming in it all around us is so overwhelming that most people feel very sick once that gets past the cracks in their defensive 'truth/fact' mind fort, and many go to extraordinary lengths dismissing it as untrue, probably more as a mental health safety mechanism than anything. Once a truth that big is accepted as truth, all the constructed realities fall apart and the world is forever changed through now-opened eyes.

Opinionating about politics without knowing the root cause behind politics is like trying to follow a recipe with a chunk torn out of it or instruction booklet with pages missing. Opinions are fine, we all have them, but until you learn and accept the truth behind it all, you simply don't know what you are talking about. You can't explain it all away with pieces missing from the real history of politics.

Once upon a time, someone discovered that drinking another person's blood or eating their brain or liver or heart after a struggle was like taking a very intoxicating drug. That got shared around some groups and cannibalism was born as a lifestyle. Conquerors eating their conquered is historical fact. So is eating babies and even fetuses, which you can see in modern photos from several countries. Ground up human is available in pill form and sold as life boosting, and tonics are created from 'young blood' to assist healing and anti-aging. These are all real and verifiable.

What the public is resisting waking up to is the fact that children are expendable product hosts, easily farmed and processed (for sauce example, look up John of God), easily afflicted into producing blood full of that intoxicating drug. What the public is resisting is the idea that lifestyles and programs all around us are set up to support 'the child' in such a way that missing children are easily funneled through these cover systems. We're talking about millions and millions of missing children all over the world over our lifetimes. Let that sink in. Millions and millions. And those are just the documented missing.

Some of the auto-deflecting back into the pre-constructed reality (fondly known as the Matrix) shows up as lengthy 'fact checking' articles that rapidly settle many minds back into safe zones. Comfort zones. No questioning, that is too alarming. Just block it all out with the thought that it can't be possible.

The problem with that is we have so many people who have survived ritual abuse and witnessed child murders for blood harvesting that whole conspiracy explanations have been detailed around silencing that back up, with hashtags like #metoo sideswiping original movements, algorithms burying proof under mountains of 'fact checking', and hours of brainwashing attention away that we can literally be right next to a person talking about it and flick an off switch in our brains, like it's just not real. It's very real for ritual abuse survivors with PTSD and dissociative depression issues, but the person next to them is so desensitized with programming muffling what can't possibly be true that it's almost like no one is talking.

I've mentioned before in other places that I've met a ritual abuse survivor who was too scarred up to even have normal sex, and that my own child was trafficked behind my back by her father when she was a toddler. My reality was split long ago. I've lived with jagged edges not matching, awkward reality overlays that didn't make sense, chasms between me and the people next to me. Imagine how it feels to be told by 'fact checkers' that the reality you know doesn't exist, and then you watch people scoff it off and even make crude jokes about it.

It sucks.

Then there are the people who can't accept something bad happened in their own lives, and they wall it off so hard that everything must be auto deflected or a super bad midlife crisis looms over and punches them in the gut. They could be awake to their own histories, but they sleep out of self protection. Sadly, that turns into mocking others who are awake.

Being black pilled isn't the end of the world. Black pill is often the beginning of the inner quest for one's truth, which in turn is the truth of the world. We might not be able to see the world truth until we find our inner truth. 

I'm about to switch gears into research.

I don't know why, but I've been triggered a few times this year to go look up Don Juan. Well, that might seem obvious...

Yeah, those two have been on my mind. Pretty sure no one went back in time to defame them with a story, but still, I kept wondering why I felt triggered to check it out.

So I finally did look up Don Juan, went straight to wikipedia, and I found out this play goes way back to around 1630. I oftentimes go on free association binges that somehow turn up loads of useful information, and this is no exception.
"Don Juan (Spanish pronounced [doΕ‹Λˆxwan]), also known as Don Giovanni (Italian), is a legendary, fictional libertine. Famous versions of the story include a 17th-century play, El burlador de Sevilla y convidado de piedra (The Trickster of Seville and the Stone Guest) by Tirso de Molina, and an 1787 opera, Don Giovanni, with music by Mozart and a libretto by Lorenzo da Ponte."

"Mozart's opera Don Giovanni has been called "the opera of all operas".[5] First performed in Prague in 1787, it inspired works by E. T. A. Hoffmann, Alexander Pushkin, SΓΈren Kierkegaard, George Bernard Shaw and Albert Camus. The critic Charles Rosen analyzes the appeal of Mozart's opera in terms of "the seductive physical power" of a music linked with libertinism, political fervor, and incipient Romanticism.[6]"

So... Libertine Romanticism?

Guys, that was politics.

Looking back helps us see the way forward. Sexual license and brutalizing others for pleasure and profit is a part of our long, dark, sordid history behind the scenes. What scenes? Well, how about our churches telling us to strictly behave while our politicians behave like monsters behind their closed doors. And lately, the Pope being arrested is all over rumors, and we know for a fact that hundreds of priests have either stepped down or been admonished over sexual license with children.

It's always happening somewhere else, isn't it? If we were to start listening to the voices all around us talking about the rituals they survived, we'd know it's just everywhere. Honestly, where do you guys think the idea of Blass Mass even comes from? Ever wonder why it's tied to so much fiction in our entertainment?

Moving on with my free associating.

I get Don Juan and Don Quixote mixed up.
"The plot revolves around the adventures of a noble (hidalgo) from La Mancha named Alonso Quixano, who reads so many chivalric romances that he loses his mind and decides to become a knight-errant (caballero andante) to revive chivalry and serve his nation, under the name Don Quixote de la Mancha. He recruits a simple farmer, Sancho Panza, as his squire, who often employs a unique, earthy wit in dealing with Don Quixote's rhetorical monologues on knighthood, already considered old-fashioned at the time. Don Quixote, in the first part of the book, does not see the world for what it is and prefers to imagine that he is living out a knightly story. 

The book had a major influence on the literary community, as evidenced by direct references in Alexandre Dumas' The Three Musketeers (1844), Mark Twain's Adventures of Huckleberry Finn (1884), and Edmond Rostand's Cyrano de Bergerac (1897), as well as the word quixotic and the epithet Lothario; the latter refers to a character in "El curioso impertinente" ("The Impertinently Curious Man"), an intercalated story that appears in Part One, chapters 33–35. The 19th-century German philosopher Arthur Schopenhauer cited Don Quixote as one of the four greatest novels ever written.[7] 

When first published, Don Quixote was usually interpreted as a comic novel. After the French Revolution, it was better known for its central ethic that individuals can be right while society is quite wrong and seen as disenchanting. In the 19th century, it was seen as a social commentary, but no one could easily tell "whose side Cervantes was on". Many critics came to view the work as a tragedy in which Don Quixote's idealism and nobility are viewed by the post-chivalric world as insane, and are defeated and rendered useless by common reality. By the 20th century, the novel had come to occupy a canonical space as one of the foundations of modern literature. 

Considered "the best literary work ever written", it topped the list of the best literary works in history, which was established with the votes of one hundred great authors of 54 nationalities at the request of the Norwegian Book Club in 2002; thus, it was the only exception in the strict alphabetical order that had been arranged."

Hang on, cookie break.

Ok, I'm back.

Once upon a time, we were all living within a story within a story within a story, and it was so hard to tell what was real or not that we all went to sleep pretending it was just one story.

We read books and watched films and kept putting more stories into our heads, little realizing our own script had been written long ago by those who controlled all information- newspapers, textbooks, decades of experimental philosophies and logic debates played out on the populace like chess games, and especially comic books.

We did everything we were told. We went to school. We got jobs. We purchased and rented. We paid bills. We upgraded to credit. We fell into debt. We became trapped, frozen into place by our inabilities to pay. We grew cynical. We dug ourselves into justification trenches and modeled good citizenry. We scowled judgment over our papers at those not doing it right...

Once upon a time we watched a film about a man who was raised on camera, his whole world around him modeled to become a giant ad for a mesmerized audience. The audience was watched by another audience who thought they were real but didn't realize they were just another layer in a world so layered up with stories that no one could tell what the real, original story actually was.

Some of the people started 'deep diving' into the history of stories, trying to find out how it all really began. As the compulsion to join this hobby spread around the world, non researchers fell prey to the sutble abolition of the scientific method. Logic was slyly replaced with opinionating. Over a few short years, the people became divided between searching for truth vs defending the truth. What was truth? It was anything uttered or printed by sanctioned 'outlets' that controlled information.

The truth is that you personally have interacted with rapists and cannibals, not just once or twice in your lifetime, but more likely at least weekly, depending on our social sphere through work and extended acquaintances.

It all boils down to that.

Now. What do you want to do about that?

Because ignoring it hasn't been solving the problem.

And politics is a big, fat lie designed to cover up that problem. Why?

So... Hunter Biden's laptop is full of sex vids with kids. He is under investigation for espionage and treason regarding China and more. This is the son of the guy many of you think is about to be inaugurated. Some of us have seen hard evidence that Joe is not only complicit, but an actual crime boss in these matters. It's not hard to find, despite technocratic attempts to make it all stop so you can't find it.

Here's the question- Do you WANT a man in office whose son raped children?

Here's my own thought question- Does defending this make YOU complicit in covering up crimes against children?

Wake up, guys. If we tolerate religions run by leaders raping children, something is very wrong. Softening reality up into magic and happy endings doesn't change the reality we have been living in. We've been asleep far too long.

Wednesday, January 13, 2021


Rooting around my piles of files and mass deleting. These were funny.

These are the links Pimpy shared under this vid. If you are interested at all in how close the entire world is to CCP control via corporations, this will definitely curl your arm hairs. It's freaky how bad this has gotten and we're all just moronically stupid sheep ignoring it while we watch TV and play games and stuff. They must think we're idiots.

The Chi take over of the world https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jovtm... The Chi party leaked docs https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Oumhr...

Twitter prompted me for phone confirmation last time I was on Pinky twitter, could have been related to acknowledging I was the account owner to download the archive they had ready, and after the download was completely done, the chrome pin in my hotbar started slow flashing green waves like it was doing something, and there was nothing I could do finding what that was, so I just shut the laptop down.

Anyway, I've heard from others that just before their accounts would be deleted (not just suspended), they'd be asked to confirm their phone number. πŸ‘€ So I'm not holding my breath. Pinky has been pushing the envelope lately.

Between Pinky twitter and PinkFeldspar blogger hardcore shadowbanning analytics and stats from me now (the other blogs and twitters are doing fine, no problems), I guess even doing TV show review posts isn't going to save it now. I mentally shake my fist at the deep state skies nearly every day over spoiling all that fun I was having. πŸ˜’ I have to work at keeping my sour attitude at bay constantly. I worked hard building this whole platform, and hell if I just play along with their controls for a tiny bit of useless stat watching while the frickin world is on the very edge of burning.

I downloaded and reuploaded this because I was afraid it would disappear. It's been sitting in unlisted all this time, no views at all. Tell you what. WATCH THIS. BECAUSE THEY DON'T WANT YOU TO. If Pinky twitter and/or this blog go poof, I'm not the one doing it. I think this vid is Charlie Freak, and this was recorded months ago.

purposely contrive

To be clear, this is the kind of reach I have over 24 hours without even trying. The fact that I'm blogging on a tiny unmonetized blog and barely use my twitter accounts and rarely try to push-promo my own links (and I especially don't play the follower game or beg for retweets) doesn't mean much. People put my name in search engines and they find me. I don't know why, I've never really known why, but this is the reason I chose to publicly choose a side. I got this snip yesterday. Today, after 2 likes on it, my analytics on this particular snip, are completely shadowbanned. The rest are all still there. πŸ€” 

And that is small potatoes compared to some of the numbers I've gotten live tweeting TV shows.

I don't know how much our internet and media will be changing over the next couple months to next few years, but it's very possible that it will be up to us to migrate our content to new protected platforms. I'm already watching mass migrations to bitchute and brandnewtube and other places. I've created social media accounts at wego and anonup. I've had Gab and Parler for awhile, but I don't check them maybe once every other month, and I see this is not the week to try to pull them up. πŸ˜‚ 

I'm still hanging onto Facebook because my Lexxperience group and page are there. I still have two instagrams at ducklords and janikabanks but I hardly ever check them. 

So if you haven't figured it out, the 'news' from any and every direction now is all clashing and you either gotta close your eyes and throw darts or pick a feed narrative to stick with or just turn it all off and walk away. The one thing we do absolutely know is that troops are in the hotspot cities and we need to stay back.

We will find out the truth after the mess is cleaned up. I trust this whole Plan. I'm finding other things to do. Yesterday I made a batch of cookies and homemade ice cream, sorta like a celebration week, and the 19th is popcorn day, so I'll be making popcorn balls in a few days.

This is a great time to switch gears and play video games (if you've got internet/power), scrub your floors, take a walk outside (if your area isn't on strict lockdown/curfew), get your Valentines ready, work on hobbies, whatever keeps you somewhat enjoyably busy and keeps your mind off for a little while. It's important to keep up our calm. Remaining in a tensed up tizzy does NOT help the good guys. Keeping the 'hive mind' calm is how we reclaim our planet from Deep State, who loves keeping us worked up in the perpetual chaos of fear porn and anxiety. Stop that. Break the spell, guys.

Go see if my vid on bitchute has finished processing yet. That is the slowest vid processing I've ever seen.

Here's a vid I don't share very often. I didn't make it. The person who made it was a teaser jerk poking sticks at people and then yanking the vid, so I quietly conquered.

Be well, ok? Purposely contrive to have a great week. You are more powerful than you can imagine.

Tuesday, January 12, 2021

eyes on

Pasting this over, source from Judy, origin from Charlie, Simon, and Danielle has already been removed by the deep state.

NOTE OF INTEREST- January 19th is National Popcorn Day. πŸ˜‚

Within hours the big media companies would be taken down. Executive Order 13959 would go into effect that prohibits investments in Chinese Communist Military companies: it was a declaration of war on Big Tech. On Wikipedia there is a list of all the big media channels that would be taken down. There was expected to be a collapse in the Stock Market.

ATMs, Internet and credit card processing could go down at any time.

Be ready to have five days of no cash, no credit card and no internet.

Make sure you're stocked up on food, water, meds, fuel, candles/batteries, pet supplies, and cash. We expect periodic POSSIBLE power outages, telephone or cell phone outages, or Internet... be prepared for anything. They're suggesting perhaps 10 days worth.

If you're instructed to stay indoors it's for your own safety. Do not engage the military. They are part of a global op to take down the deep state cabal and are not threatening to The People.

Everyone will be getting emergency alerts on their phones, tv's, radios & internet. It would override all other broadcasts and could last for several hours at a time.

Do not to be scared of what's coming as it is for the safety of our nation for this to unfold.

DO NOT travel to any large cities (especially Philadelphia) for the rest of the month. Military operations will be taking place in many of the major corrupt cities.

People [[D]eep State Antifa BLM] will start rioting once this Intel breaks. The propaganda would be that Trump was a military dictator.

Trump and the Department of Defense Special Force Units have only until 19 Jan. to put this down.

Marines and National Guard troops were being moved as needed for the riots that would start after the national release of the Intel.

The Intel would be dropped for everyone to see and hear in loops that would be several hours long.

A few days ago the system was checked by the FCC alerting ALL media that they could not block the flow of Intel under federal regulations.

Trump would be moved continuously like a chess piece from now until the 20th in order to avoid any retaliation against him and family.

fighting the good fight

Remember how I used to coach spoonies on mapping out their days with a syllabus style schedule? My most popular post EVER on my biggest pinky blog is summer syllabus. I was very fail back then, but I found a way to wade through all that related depression and plan out my usefulness strategies. In case you want more, here are the next 9 of the current top 10 over there.

And this one slid out of the top ten into 11th but for several years it was pretty solid. This one is a literal syllabus.

So let's get back to today! πŸ˜€

I've said a few times recently that the last 3 years of getting up through the middle of the night nearly every single night to keep researching and sharing has finally caught up with me. I have spent this last week doing everything in my power to get back onto a real sleep schedule, needfully at last 6 hours a night. You guys didn't see me powering through the last 6 months on 2-4 hours of sleep at a time, and many times as little 1-3 hour power nap after being up for several hours. It felt very compulsive, and once the rally and Capitol Hill happened, I felt 'released'. I started feeling proper exhaustion, as one should, and I started rearranging my activity level into more 'down' time, more breaks without phone in hand, more time away from all screens, and it took about 4 days but I finally started SLEEPING. And I don't mean real sleep, a lot of people would still feel like they're dying on the scant sleep I'm still getting, but last night I actually got 6 hours without waking up once, and I can't tell you the relief that is on my head today.

I imagine a lot of the digital warriors out there might be feeling the same way, so I'm going to share my recovery strategies, gained from years of spoonie recovery and healing from massive injury and illness over a couple of decades. This is how I made it through the exhaustion and the depression that comes with it. A lot of it is using your mind to game your way into healthy living.

The very first thing I ask during self assessment is whether I'm able to be good for others in the current shape I'm in. If I'm so wound up and focused that I'm losing energy levels and feeling frustrated, it's time to take a break, or several. I cannot be good for other people if I'm not being good for myself.

We are all human. We need sleep, good nutrition, laughter, chill time, basically feel good stuff. When we feel good, we are better for other people. When we have a little more energy, we are able to have more positive interactions, which impacts others. If we are impacting them negatively, we're not helping anything. When I realize I'm starting to feel cranky and fighty and judgy, it's time to take my crankyfightyjudgy self off the radar and self care. Eating boxed cereal and slugging caffeine is NOT self care. That is a grind into deeper exhaustion, and I know because I've done it.

Self care involves a little planning. Menu planning immediately comes to mind. Do you have the ingredients to pull together something yummy? Even if you don't feel like going through the motions, oftentimes just 20 minutes can make a much nicer meal than something out of a box or bag. You get better protein and less salt and sugar when you create your own yum. What is your favorite food? What are you in the mood for? Got the groceries for that? Maybe take a couple minutes to make a list, and then get thyself to a grocery store, because you are awesome and you deserve a nice meal. And since we don't have servants, it's up to us to do this for ourselves. If we don't care about ourselves, who will? It's up to us to feed ourselves nicer food than the crap that Deep State has gotten us hooked on. Remember, they want us dead. Don't play along with that agenda. This is part of fighting the good fight.

Have you brushed your teeth today? One of my first self care assessment questions usually goes to my ickiest fail. We all know what mask breath is like, how gingivitis sucketh, and dentistry is medieval torture to most of us. How about we tame that outa control beast and get a nice new soft bristle toothbrush and spend a minute or two every day moving some of that slime off our beautiful enamel? And I don't care what color or condition your enamel is in, enamel is cool stuff. Be proud that you have enamel if you don't have dentures yet. Enamel is pricey stuff to own, so proactively taking care of it makes sense. Plus, there's nothing like a fresh mouth, right? I also top it off with a good Listerene swish (a little Listerene rinse on your new toothbrush is nice, too, kills those germs you can't see when you're all done). You get used to that fresh mouth feeling and your day actually feels better. I have used brushing my teeth to get through so many anxiety attacks over the years because it feels like I'm doing something useful while I get through a few miserable minutes. Also, if you're on loads of meds (which I've been in the past, so I know), tooth decay becomes a real problem. Big Pharma promotes your teeth rotting, maybe not as quickly as doing meth, but it's a real problem with spoonies because dry mouth and other problems. Brushing your teeth is part of fighting the good fight against Big Pharma. Remember that!

I'm not going to go through everything down an extensive list, but that is a great way to start thinking about self assessment. Get off the emotional roller coaster of fail and faceplant, take a little time to step back and refresh, and make logical decisions about how you want your day to roll out. If it helps (this really did help me starting out), make a sticker chart, just like we had back in school. It's fun and cute and you can see real progress that way. Don't load yourself down too quickly with #ALLTHECHANGE, start easy, get accustomed to making your starter set a daily habit, then slowly add one or two more things as you feel able to handle more.

Part of being human is that gung-ho feeling when we get excited and then that fail feeling when the excitement wears off and then the mopping up with bad habits thing when we want comfort for fail. Deep State fully supports that. Be smarter than your deep state programming! If you feel yourself starting to slide off rails or spin out of orbit or gloriously faceplant into a ditch, go Ah-HA! and pat yourself on the back for noticing before automatically clicking into deep state behavioral patterns. Just because something makes us feel good (alcohol, porn, trolling, eating, etc) doesn't mean it actually makes us feel good. Those are traps! Set by the deep state! They want you alone and miserable and curling up with comfort offerings they pump into your eyes through screens, and they laugh when you fall for it. Don't give them your money! They laugh because you will give them your meager amount of money trying to comfort your fail self. Go open a window and get some fresh air! Weird that no one ever suggests doing that to feel better...

So back to me, I'm finally getting a little real sleep again, and I'm pretty sure the world didn't fall apart while I was taking time away to do that. We need to be fresh, not constantly wound up so tight that the springs break when we finally snap. Also, I made homemade tacos last night, and super fail because salsa never made our big stock up grocery list, and we cannot make it through a possible super military lockdown without salsa, so I may run into town in a little bit and fix that, plus a few other odds and ends on a new little list.

Personally, I still think most of the country won't suffer very much with whatever is really going on. I've heard Visa and Mastercard might go down electronically for a few days, kinda wondering if that is part of the big gold standard banking revalue thing they're finishing up. Whole world is about to super synch on banking, and that is NOT global banking, which is now defunct and bankrupt and that is partly what this war thing is about. (If you haven't see the πŸ‘‰#PelosiLovesTrumpπŸ‘ˆ feed, you're missing digital warriors at their finest.)

I've gotta go do stuff. Hope you guys are having a great day, sincere hugs for the hard stuff, and just know you're not alone. πŸ’• The whole world is waking up now. See my Pinky twitter and strayhen for link shares, scroll down and make sure you are getting caught up. Not sure how long they'll be there, just lost my Janika twitter yesterday over one tiny little thing. πŸ™„ I kinda started provoking from Pinky twitter after that, because evidently laying below the radar doesn't save me any more. I'm hearing the biggie technocratic medias will be going away anyway, so make sure you archive your feeds if you have long histories full of cool stuff, like I do.

I know, a couple of you are waiting for another #TomCavanaghWatch post as part of the mental health distraction from all this ridiculous political mess. I'll work on something after I've caught up on a little more rest, ok? It's been a really busy holiday/winter around here. 😊

Guys, the white hat alliance is fighting for us all just like this beautiful vid. Imagine the world when we are all really free from the Deep State. Soon now.

Monday, January 11, 2021

nearly there

Trying out a couple new accounts on platforms that likely won't wipe my accounts out. The screenshots click to sites if you want to try them out, too.

Like other alt accounts I've made, they'll probably sit there... lol.

I'm still on break. My sleep schedule is blitzed and it's affecting me bigly now, so I'm napping a lot and chillin on game. Patriots got this. Btw, don't confooz military industrial complex with our militaries protecting the Constitutional Republic. Just because you see 'army' roll through, don't assume. Just stay back, mind your beeswax, and keep your family safe at home. Few weeks of weird and the mess will be straightened out. Like I've been saying, this was planned out for a long time, and if you still aren't sure what's going on, mainstream 'news' and andrenaline rush social media will only make it worse now. I've got links to good sources sprinkled through posts here, plus on my twitter at strayhen.

Find your inner peace and create your healing calm. We're nearly there.

Sunday, January 10, 2021

relaxing helps us be ready, too

My first crafting project after I got my magic academy

I'm SLEEPING. Includes naps.

Kinda sprained my thumb doing too much when I'm not sleeping, so I'm resting my hand.

My personal opinion on the big hooplah about to drop from the white hats- (pay attention, ok)
The whole point of their approach is to keep as many Americans safe as possible, and not to make their lives worse. If anyone seriously disrupts power or comms or whatever, it's more likely the black hats. I know some of you are all gung ho about white hats TAKING CHARGE, but the entire operation has been very marked by subtlety and not disrupting lives, including sweetly lowering drug prices and fixing many, many things behind the scenes that most Americans have no idea even happened, so to think they'd suddenly just yanked the plugs out and MOW THE GRASS is kinda not paying attention to what's been happening.

That being said, turn off your screens for a bit, calm your chill, and go enjoy something unrelated, ok? It's just as crucial to the operation that we actually create positivity and think kindly and literally calm so our own bodies can remain in a state of healing as it is to be ready.

Saturday, January 9, 2021

the Temple of Congress

Nancy Pelosi called the U.S. Capitol "the temple of our American democracy". This snip clicks to The Hill article.

Words are important. Let's check dictionary.com, and then think about how these definitions might be layered into the mainstream doublethink doublespeak narrative.


Obviously, we don't have democracy if an entire national election got hijacked, and yes, there is plenty of proof and stfu if you're an automatic kneejerk troll who refuses to use your own brain at all to see the reams of proofs I and others and especially lawyers have already published and shared. Govt by the people for the people is a joke since 4/5 of us had our votes stomped right out of that national election. Equal rights and privileges don't exist in a world where elite leaders can break laws willy nilly and live comfortably during lockdowns that are killing people with despair. And to be clear, America is supposed to be a Constitutional Republic, not a democratic republic like Pelosi keeps saying. The Constitution protects our habeas corpus, democracy does not.


Govt buildings are not temples. The Speaker of the House of Representatives knows better than to bandy words around. Church and State are supposed to be separated by law. Even metaphorically, Capitol Hill being referred to as a temple (aka a temple on a hill, which is biblical) indicates it refers to a false god controlling society. To make this reference in this emotional context for mainstream narrative is SPIN designed to hook listeners into believing she means well.


How in the world do you skip from such an official definition to pretty much what amounts to literal orgy?

Maybe this is a big red flag we should be paying attention to. πŸ€” Let's see who else uses the word congress.

These snips are from Benjamin Fulford.

I want to be very clear.

ANY of my friends who knowingly support child trafficking via supporting the people who run the child trafficking industry (which I've shared plenty about in past posts and on social medias) are COMPLICIT in my book. This doesn't mean we can't ever talk, it just means you suck prodigiously and I can't trust you.

ANY of my friends who unknowingly support this agenda via supporting people who run the child trafficking industry need to wake up because this WILL be hitting mainstream very soon now, and you WILL have choose a side. No more sitting on the fence. You either support child rape, torture, and murder, or you don't.

THIS is what is behind EVERYTHING going on in politics right now.

I have spent the last 3 years extensively researching this and finding other people researching even deeper digs on all this. Over those 3 years I have shared links to sources showing how this started, who all are involved all over the world, how the U.S. was compromised, and how we are now in a war to purge out and clean up that nasty mess ALL OVER THE WORLD. Your 'news' will not tell you this. They are complicit. I have shared these things at the risk of losing everything I have on the internet over technocracy's stupid cancel culture, at the risk of me and my extended family being doxxed, and at the risk of losing most of my friends.

Sometimes something is more important than hiding behind avatars and pretending to go along with the crowds.

Truth is not on your TV screens or your social media apps.